Do you ever feel alone, even when you are surrounded with a lot of people? It is a normal feelings. It is especially normal when you suffer from anxiety. So what are the root causes of this feeling? Is it:
- Household Issues
- Family Issues
- Work Issues
- Dealing With A High Conflict Ex
- Financial Struggles
- Lack Of Self-Confidence
- Questioning Your Being
What ever the cause may be, you still feel alone, right? You feel as though no one listens and you cannot express your inner feelings without being judged. You feel as though you are in this world all alone, and cannot escape even if you have every source to do so.
With children, it is even harder. You cannot just cancel on their school day to go and run town. You cannot just leave them in a room for hours so you can cry your eyes out. No, you have to still take care of them. You still have to live your every day life. Yes we get our “mommy time” to just vent, but it should not result in a multiple hour fest to where we are avoiding the children.
In this world of being a mother, there is a huge community that is going through the same thing. Whether it be through small groups at your church, private groups on Facebook, or just chatting with your close friend. You have means to meet others who understand you!
I am in a private group on Facebook specifically for stepmothers. What I learned from the group, is that we are all going through something whether it be the same thing or different. But the cool thing is, we all help each other out. One stepmother may feel resentment towards her stepchildren, one may feel totally alone in the world, one may be so prideful and constantly fights with biomom, and one may be great but needs help on how to manage the holidays with stepchildren. Guess what? We help each other out.
Find your group and find your strength. In order to have strong children, you need to be strong as a momma. If that means you meet your friend once a week for a coffee and chat, so be it. Get you some time to yourself. I understand having children can be stressful. I do not get a break from my daughter. Her father is not involved, I do not give her over to others so I can complete things alone, and I honestly want to be with her.
With that being said, I feel alone at times. I feel like NO ONE is understanding of the struggles of being a stepmom. The mom role, I have done. I love watching my daughter grow and she can be on her own while I complete things within the home. But what if you are feeling alone due to constantly having to struggle over the stepchildren, struggle over the high-conflict exes, over… life?
You may have a life full of people, events, and work; but do you have true, genuine happiness? It seems as though when we are in a pit in our life, we fall into a routine. We go to work, come home, clean, cook dinner, spend a little amount of time with our children before bed time, shower, and go to sleep; just to wake up again and do the same thing.
Sure you may have some friends that say they understand you, but do they truly? You need to find your tribe. You need to find people and groups that TRULY do understand you. As I am sitting here typing this, I am overwhelmed with tears. I get how you feel, momma. I understand the loneliness in this world. I understand the struggle.
I guess what I am trying to get to is this:
You need to find your peace within you. You deserve to have your voice heard. You are NOT ALONE!!
For stepmother and mother support, feel free to follow me on Instagram via Project:Momhood. I am available daily providing advice, communication to fellow mommas, and supporting YOU, girl!
Hang in there, momma.